101 Rules of Black Metal
1. Dont be gay.
2. Be true.
3. all(a) people who arent true are gay.
4. Be fateful.
5. Be necro.
6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible.
7. Break things turn being grim and necro.
8. Dont have fun at concerts. base of operations around with arms crossed.
9. Repeat all above spot denouncing organized religion in any form.
10. Never ever, ever so under ANY circumstances...
11. ...Listen to Peccatum.
12. When someone asks you if you enjoy the music of Mayhem, exhibit out that
you only enjoy the music of the true Mayhem. daredevil is gay.
13. Dont play with fuzzy things, excepting that by play you mean blow up.
14. Dont be Dani Filth.
15. Never, ever, under any circumstances utter the parlance Kenny G slams,
man.
16. Dont be Dani Filth.
17. When your mom tells you to take out the drool tell her that youre too
metal to remove refuse.
18. Run for it!
19. Sodomize a virgin whore.
20. Sodomize anything that is not male. (Fuzzy things look out!)
21. recognise sure your album goes out of print about 3 years after its
release... so it becomes cult.
22. When in doubt, say lawful Norwiegian Black Metal!
23. If that doesnt work, blast beats can conduct any silence.
24. Turn any cross you find upside-down.
25.
boob twisting is not a blackmetal activity..
26. Write a cult, underground, grim and necro zine. Feature only interviews
with bands no one has heard of, eve true
blackmetallers.
27. Never ever, EVER, EVER be open-minded.
28. Never economise songs less than 15 minutes long and containing less than 15
adjectives in the title.
29. a) paint face. b) go in woods. c) act like troll.
30. Dont be Mortiis (or Dani Filth).
31. Dont wear white shoes after Labor Day.
32. Dont bear jokes only your mom would get.
33. Dont make jokes.
34. When in doubt, scowl with look downturned.
35. Dont eat Marshmellow Peeps.
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